Commando Parenting

I have to admit that I have been very emotional over the past few days. Mostly, as I've already admitted, because I feel impotent and helpless right now. I also feel betrayed. I feel betrayed by the government that has been sworn to protect and defend my country and its citizens. I've never felt betrayed by my country's government before, and I never thought I would that way about this one. It's a very strange and wholly terrible feeling. Anyways, I have to say that I have come up with a plan to deal with this whole mess. Now, it may seem comical, but it's time tested and true.

Firstly, I have to admit that I am a Dr Phil fan. I try and watch his show every-day. Stop the snickering and pointing. It may be taboo, but the man is a genius, no matter what you say. We're a season behind from America, so those of you reading from the states, bear with me. Season 3's theme is "Family First". Dr Phil's goal is to make family a top priority again in America. It also goes along with his book, "Family First". It's a book designed to create the "phenomenal family". So, yesterday's show was dealing with ruly, misbehaving, rude children. As he was talking to the parents of a 5 year old girl, it hit me! He might as well be talking about the way that Olmert and the government is dealing with the Palestinians, and that the same exact rules apply here.

Picture it this way: The Palestinians are a 5 year old child, and Olmert is the parent. Dr Phil said that the biggest detriment to a child's proper development, especially in the area of behavior is inconsistency. Kids are smart. They pick up on things. When they see inconsistency coming from their parents, they know that they can get away with anything, and that manipulation will work wonders. When a kid does something wrong, and the parent says that they're going to punish them and then doesn't, the kid realizes, "Well then, I guess this is OK. I can do whatever I want and get whatever I want, because mom and dad aint gonna do nothing about it. They say they will, but they don't. That means I can keep do it and other stuff to." They test the boundaries, and as long as there's inconsistency between words and actions, they keep going further and further.

In order to fix this, Dr Phil says that parents have to use what he calls, "Commando Parenting". It basically means that the kid's world, as they know it, has to come to an end. They have to hear and experience consistency, because that's the only thing they respond to. They have to be able to predict with 100% certainty that if they do something bad or wrong, x, y, or z is going to happen. Their world will come crashing down. And, the bad behavior will stop immediately. How do you bring the kid's world to an end to create consistency? You strip them of everything they know and own. You take away their clothes, their toys, their TVs, video games, even their beds if you have to. Have them sleeping on a mattress with just a blanket, sheet and pillow if necessary. Then, you tell them that as their behavior improves, they will slowly get their things and priviledges back.

So to here, Olmert has to first get some balls and start being consistent. What he says, he has to do. Then, the Palestinians' world, as they know it, has to come to an end. We disengaged from Gaza, but we are still breast-feeding the PA. We, and by "we", I mean the Israeli tax payers, are still providing and paying for the Palestinians' water and electricity. Therefore, the Palestinians know that whatever they do, Israel is not going to take away their priviledges. The back-lash from the international community would be swift and merciless. Olmert is still providing the PA with weapons, hoping against hope that they'll be used to protect Abbas and not to kill other Palestinians or Israelis. We have to, finally, take away the crutch from under the Palestinians. They will never declare independence, they will never become independent as long as Israel and the rest of the world is willing to piggy-back them on their shoulders. Why bother declaring a state? The world is paying for their food. Israel is paying for their utilities and water and medical care. They don't have to actually do anything on their own. At least, none of the menial work that a state actually has to do in order to be a state. They don't have to create any government institutions. You know, all that really non-sexy stuff that it takes to actually run a country. No, as long as they're dependent on Israel, they can keep up the poor aggrieved occupied people act. They can keep playing the victim, and we keep reinforcing that poor self-esteem.

In order to reinforce children, you must wean them off of having to depend on you, the parent, from doing everything for them. When children first learn to walk, they fall down. They hurt themselves and cry, but good parents don't just pick them up and say they never have to try walking on their own again. No, good parents calm the kid down and then let them go through the pain and frustration until finally they're taking those first firm steps on their own. Those are already the first signs of independence from parents. But, inconsistency ruins a child's development and independence.

It's about time the world and Israel stop growing a mama's boy and raise a man. Be consistent, end the Palestinians' world as they know it to force them to realize that this bad behavior won't be tolerated, and force them to walk on their own. The first baby steps, like any other newly formed country, are always hard, painful, and frustrating, but in the end, they do walk on their own. As long as they are coddled and able to successfully manipulate, they will never grow up, and they will always know that they can walk all over us. Five year olds aren't stupid.